Follow the Carrot

My cousin recently gave me the best compliment I could possibly receive at this time in my life. She remarked that I seemed much stronger and decisive than just a few months ago. She could have thought for a hundred years and not come up with a better compliment than that.

I have struggled emotionally in the last year to the depths that I do not wish to revisit. However, in the last couple of months I do feel stronger, more confident and decisive. I am reclaiming my mojo (odd phrase, mojo).

I still have a lot of things that I need to improve, not ready to share what they are just yet and not sure it would do any good if I did. But, I will tell you that they are not earth shattering things. It just seems that the goals I have are hard to attain...but then again, they all seem that way don't they? It doesn't matter what you are working toward there is always a time when you feel like the donkey on the "carousel" (I'm sure there is a better word than this for it). You know what I mean though, tie the donkey to the carousel and dangle a carrot in front of him so that he will continue to walk and cause the carousel to go 'round and 'round.

I feel that way sometimes, like I am just going 'round and 'round and never reaching the desired destination. However, I have to remind myself that I am not tied to a carousel. I don't just go 'round and 'round, I actually make progress. It is not always measureable, but if you keep going one day you find that you are in a different place, hopefully the desired place.

I keep remembering a time in my life that within 2 years I became exactly who I wanted to be then. Back then, I didn't have a time frame in mind, I do now. I wonder if the time frame will make a difference in my ability to achieve? Will I exceed what I hope? or will I fall short?or will I get it just right?

I would settle for just right. Time to follow the carrot...