New-Again

Well I have definitely "grabbed the bull by the horns" with my new-again ambition. I completed 2 chapters and 4 quizzes for school today. Everything seems urgent. After so long of not having a sense of urgency it is truly invigorating.

I have rewritten this part of the post so many times because each time I write something it sounds pompous and a bit haughty. That is not what I want to convey. But there is no other way to say it but to say...I feel like I am starting to live again on a multitude of  levels. Most important to me right now is the energetic way that I am approaching work and my goals. I have not felt this motivated and elated about my future in probably 8 years. It makes me feel alive. I was not able to really put my finger on it before. But the one thing that made me the happiest was always being the best at something. I have not been the best in years. I think I still have it in me now. At one point I thought that feeling and desire may have dissipated with age. Not true, it dissipated with depression and the feelings of defeat and despair.

In short, I feel strong and determined.