Remember that one lone plant that I bought? I bought that plant thinking that I would buy a lot more as I do every year. This year is gonna be an exception. I can barely keep that one lone plant alive. I worked more than 12 hours yesterday. Now I have worked long days for a lot of years, but it was always sitting on my ass kinda work.The work that I do now is physically taxing. I do not have energy left by the time I get home. Therefore, that one lone plant is not getting the attention it needs and I know that having a nice garden is out of the question. I'm gonna miss the gardening.
The long days also make it necessary for some changes in the home life. I have two children still at home, one is 16 and the other is 14. I'm offering them honest to goodness paying jobs this summer. I am willing to pay for a clean house. Let me explain why this is such a big deal. I have always had the philosophy that you don't get paid to be part of the family. That means everyone pulls their own weight as far as household chores, therefore, I have never given them an "allowance". Why am I now willing to pay my children to keep a clean house? Because I am unable to pull my own weight. Therefore, I will pay the kids to do my part. Perhaps, giving them a nice stipend for their work and what should be my work, I will be able to do more cooking and maybe even throw some gardening in there (probably wishful thinking).
At any rate, things change. I'm gonna have to pay my kids to keep up my end of the housework, but make no mistake (this is for them when they read this) I will fire them if it is not done to specifications and then they will do it for free (think this will be a deterant to slacking off?).
When I was a kid there was no paying me for housework. There was also no movies, no going out of any kind. The only thing I ever remember getting was a 10-speed bicycle. Keep in mind there also was no birthday gifts, no christmas gifts etc. So the year that I got a bicycle (summer between 5th and 6th grade) was huge. I had younger siblings and a niece to take care of, not to mention a mother with mental illness. In fact instead of paying me anything, I specifically recall my parents stealing, yes stealing, my babysitting money that I had saved for months. There was no discussion, I just came home from school one day and it was gone. I was saving that money for my school clothes so that I would be able to have a few new items and not just garage sale items for school. They never said they needed it, they never said they would pay it back, they just took it.
Out of that experience I came away with the idea that I would pay for my children to go out with friends and/or I would take them out. But, that being part of a family means sacrifice and keeping up with the household foregoing payment for the chores.
Times change and so do people. The times that I live in have me living in conditions that I consider substandard as far as cleanliness goes, and I do not cook for the family often enough. I hope I have found a system that will work for all of us and provide a nicer home life. Now all I have to do is monitor the kids and their work and act as their boss at home, instead of just parent. Let's see how this goes...
Malicious Extrapolation
9 years ago
Posts
imho the kids should be doing this for you for free to support you in this new career the way you have supported them in everything they have chosen to do. As you said, they shouldn't get paid for being a part of the family and I think you are more than carrying "your load" in working 12 hours a day.
ReplyDeleteAt 14 and 16, they are old enough to see your sacrifice and step up without being asked or paid. They are also old enough to make dinner or clean and do their own laundry without being paid to do it.
You shouldn't have to monitor them or be their boss. They should be proud to be your kids and do whatever they see needs to be done to help you out at home. Consider payment the fact they have a roof over their heads, food in the fridge and a mom that doesn't take their babysitting money. They are good kids and I am sure, given the option to support you without having to be paid, in exchange for the continuing going out money, etc, they would choose to do the right thing. After all, there are many times, in any relationship, whether work or personal, that you have to carry more than your weight, without getting paid for it. Good lessons are always learned young.